Backrow forward Tom Ellis, and his partner Grace, are expecting their first child together in the early stages of 2021 and the 26-year-old has revealed how he managed to keep himself busy away from the pitch in preparation of their new-born.
Ellis will become a father for the first time this year and he explained his feelings ahead of this life-changing and wonderful event.
He said: “I am nervous and excited. I guess it’s quite a weird feeling, I’m not too sure how to feel about it until it all happens. I feel a strong sense of responsibility already and that is quite a scary thought when the baby isn’t here yet.”
With a global pandemic and two national lockdowns bringing change to the life as we knew it, Ellis admitted that he’s been keeping himself busy during the extra time off, alongside training commitments, and revealed how Grace told him the news.
He continued: “Grace and I have done a lot in the last eight months. We’ve moved to a new house, but we have had to temporarily move in with my parents and then with Sam Underhill and his partner for a while whilst we renovated.
“In some ways, it has flown by because we’ve had so much going on, but we’ve managed to squeeze a lot in that time. I am still a little bit daunted; the penny hasn’t completely dropped with me yet, I don’t think, just that this little baby is going to be here for life.
“Grace had her suspicions, but I remember coming downstairs one morning and she was watching an episode of something on the TV, she waited for that episode to finish. She then stopped watching the TV and turned to me, she had done a test prior to this and said, ‘oh by the way I’m pregnant’.
“My reaction blew up, I had wondered why she’d waited for the episode to finish before telling me, but she just wanted to finish it before she shared the good news because she was enjoying it. I’ve always wanted to have kids, so I am really excited.”
Ellis and his partner have decided to keep the gender of their child a surprise and will find out on the day of birth. The flanker also revealed the differing reactions they received from his parents and to-be parents in law when they broke the news.
On finding out the gender, Ellis said: “We’ve not found out the gender. We have left it as a surprise, which is quite nice really. We are excited to find out, but it has meant that everything is grey and white and very neutral in the room we’ve decorated. It’s just really exciting not knowing what we are going to have. We both think it’s going to be a girl, but I don’t think either of us really mind.”
“We waited to let our families know until 13 weeks in. We first went down to Graces’ parents and wrapped them a baby grow and gave that to them to open. They have literally just got a new kitten, and their reaction was ‘how is the cat getting in this?’, then the penny dropped, and they were elated with our news. With my parents we wrapped up something baby-related again, and my mum was very excited.”
“We’ve got a few name ideas already but we haven’t spoken too much about it, just purely because we don’t know. It may be nameless for a few days when it arrives but we’re getting closer and we have a shorter list than we had previously. We have done a little bit of googling for name ideas, it’s quite hard as you can already scrub out names of people you know that share the same names.”
Ellis is a longstanding player within the current senior squad and holds off-field relationships with a number of the playing squad. He revealed how they reacted to the news, knowing the backrow through and through.
The 26-year-old continued: “We told a few people in the squad early, who Grace and I hang around with more outside of Bath Rugby. We told Charlie Ewels and his partner quite early, and Charlie was caught off guard when I told him, which was funny. The squad have been really supportive of us, and with lockdowns in 2020, they have been really eventful. We’ve done the house, got engaged and now we’re having a child together. There has been a lot going on.”
“I’m quite close with Tom Dunn, so I’ve spoken to him for some parental advice already. I am his daughter’s god father, so I think I have a vague idea of what it’s going to be like. Anthony has just become a dad too, so I’ve spoken to him a lot. We are just really excited so we will find our way through it.”
“There is quite a lot of stuff on the go I suppose, you will learn what it likes and doesn’t like as it grows. There are a lot of guidelines but also a lot of ‘you’ll have to work it out as you go’ too so that’s the way we will take it – we’ll learn on the go as it will be with most parents.”
Having read countless books, magazines and google articles on the do’s and don’ts of becoming a parent, Ellis revealed what he might struggle with most and admits being an Uncle has given him some insight into what he can expect.
He said: “One thing that I will likely dread about becoming a father is the sleepless nights. I don’t think I will struggle too much before days off and that kind of stuff but nights before games are where I think I may struggle. I will need to have my sleep on those nights so it will fall to Grace to pick up. We have pre-planned to share responsibilities but again we will have to see how we go; we might be blessed with a sleepy baby.”
“I am an uncle and they are seven and ten. I do babysit them, but I didn’t when they were babies. I am the cool uncle that plays with them and gives them sugar and then hands them back when they are bouncing off the walls.”
“I was always brought up to work as hard as I can, so I hope to pass that down to the little one. Also, just an appreciation of what we have and how lucky we are to have what we have.”
Having already thought about what babygrows to buy his child, Ellis admitted he’ll be buying a West Ham United one, his beloved football team, as well as a Bath Rugby one, of course. The 26-year-old explained how he got into supporting the Hammers and how he gets the banter flowing in the squad from following the side.
Ellis continued: “I have a very dubious link to being a West Ham fan as it is. I would be happy if they were, but I can see Grace’s dad trying to make them a Bristol Rovers fan. I will try and get a West Ham baby grow for the next game! We will have to see if there is a Bath Rugby one going at the time in the Club shop too, of course.
“My family is very rugby orientated but I became a football fan when I was 12. Just genuinely wanted to get involved and I had a friend at school who offered me to become a West Ham fan, and there weren’t many of us, so I decided to start supporting them. I brought a shirt online from the last year they were in the Championship where they won the play-off final and then since that I have been to a game or two every year with him as he’s now a season ticket holder.
“So, from 12 I’ve shown a keen interest in them and since the Fantasy Premier League has become quite a big part of my life at the moment. I always have a slight West Ham bias in that, my team name is actually West Ham Sandwich. I have a bit of banter between myself and Henry Thomas because he’s a Tottenham fan and they thought they had us at 3-0 after 85 minutes but somehow we managed to salvage a draw from it this season.”